It tickles when I pee

Hryna's tadpole


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It is the day when I notice that my days have not yet been announced. No, wait, that's not entirely true. The pelvic pull is there, but I usually have light spotting at this point in my cycle. Nothing of that can be seen, on the contrary, it fits not at all. (The half-hearted cycle monitoring of the last few months has paid off after all. ) I find it strange, but nothing more. Still, I decide to do a pregnancy test the next morning. It will be negative anyway, I think to myself.


I pee in a glass and then hold the test strip (expired January 2017, cost: less than 1 euro) in it. I don't see anything, put it aside. But somehow I hesitate. I turn on the bright light in the bathroom, the one that I don't like, and take another closer look. And now I see it, the fine line, and say "Oh" out loud (in the sense of Oops, what a strange anomaly in the universe!), then my brain becomes aware of what it is seeing and I say "Oh?" (with the meaning of Wait a moment...?) and of course it finally occurs to me that every slightly positive test can only mean one thing and I say "OH!" again. (I'm pregnant!) out. Other intelligent statements follow: "Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit." Because - as always in life - a little later it would have been better.

I run into the bedroom where my husband is still half asleep. (In truth he had already put his ears up at the first "Oh" and thought his part.) I say "Duuuuuuuu" and he replies, "Nah, right?" and then we're both pretty exhausted.

The following weeks

I calculate March 28th, 2018 as the due date, which happens to be the 30th birthday of a friend, which we all wanted to celebrate together far away by the sea. I tell her contrite, but she just laughs and is delighted that the tadpole ("Kauli") is supposed to come on her birthday.

Tadpole has been the name of the thing in me ever since I read that "your child is the size of a tadpole right now". I don't even know what week that was, but the name has held up.

Although I don't drink a lot of alcohol, it is more difficult than expected not to attract attention when I refuse it. I get poured wine at a wedding. (My husband has to take over the drinking, which results in the evening ending with a completely exhausted guy.) Later, in the dark, nobody sees that there is only water in my wine glass.

When I visit my family, my husband pats my stomach and my mother looks weird.

and today:

08/15/2018 ... 7 + 6 (8th week)

Now we've finally seen our little tadpole! That was totally cool! That something really grows in me - madness.

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