What does immense love mean
Obsessive love, from Latin obsidere: to take advantage of; keep occupied; besiege; oppress is an intense kind of love in which the thoughts ceaselessly and in great intensity revolve around the loved one. In the beginning of a love relationship, in the phase of falling in love, obsessive love is something normal. When obsessive love becomes obsession, and especially when it is not reciprocated by the other, it can be pathological and lead to psychosis. The term obsessive love is also a name for one of the six love styles in John Alan Lee's model and is also referred to there as mania.
Obsessive love as intense love
Obsessive love comes from obsession, obsession. The term obsession comes from the Latin obsidere, to claim, to keep occupied. Obsessive love is love that is so strong that it is no longer under control, but that this love keeps the thoughts, feelings and actions of the lover obsessed. Obsessive love is intense love. Obsessive love is a deep love in which the lover is torn from his own ego, from his everyday life, from normality. Obessive love can become the basis for deep experiences and a re-evaluation of life. It can happen that "normal people" are suddenly gripped by obsessive love. Such obsessive love can be very valuable as a phase of life in terms of personality development. This kind of obsessive love can turn into self-sacrificing love for the other, away from self-centeredness.
Beginnings of being in love are often hallmarks of obsessive love. Young mothers and fathers often have some kind of obsessive love for their newborn.
In the course of a relationship it is important to let an obsessive love mature in trust, in mutual love that also leaves space for one another.
Obsessive love as morbid love
Obsessive love becomes a particular problem when the loved one does not reciprocate that love. Obsessive love can lead to loss of awareness and delusional delusion that the other person really loves you "deep down". Obsessive morbid love can be based on insecurity, fear, lack of self-esteem, lack of confidence in life.
Obsessive love can lead to stalking, criminal activity.
Obsessive love can be pathological, lead to psychosis and require psychiatric treatment.
A parent's obsessive love for a child can lead to overprotection and restrict the child with love. Parents too have to learn to let their children develop themselves, to give their children freedom.
Obsessive love as one of the six love styles
The American social psychologist John Alan Lee developed the model of the six love styles. A love style in this definition is a way of thinking, feeling, and acting in a love relationship. One of the six love styles is mania, what as jealous love, possessive love, mad love and also as obsessive love can be translated.
Here is a short list of these six love styles, which you can find explained in detail in this wiki under the main keyword Six love styles:
- Storge is friendly love, also called cooperative love
- Eros is erotic love, which also includes romantic love, passionate love and sexual love
- Ludus is playful love that seeks pleasure and places special emphasis on sexual love
- Agape is selfless love, self-sacrificing love, also altruistic love, in which the well-being of the other is the focus
- Pragma is the pragmatic love in which the partners support each other for goals, concerns and values outside of the partnership
- Mania is the obsessive love that this section is about
Mania as a love style is usually not to be understood as pathological here. Mania, obsessive love, is an intense love in which the other is at the center of longing, thinking and feeling in an emotionally intense way. This type of obsessive love is characterized by extreme emotional fluctuations: great love, fulfillment, gratitude alternate with jealousy, fear of abandonment and despair.
More on the subject of mania as a love style under the main keywords Mania and Jealous love.
Tips for obsessive love
If you suffer from obsessive love yourself, here are a few tips:
- Make sure that you take care of your day-to-day life. Do not neglect your work and your duties
- Practice yoga and meditation. This is how you find access to the depths of yourself, and access to a serenity
- Practice self-control. Do not act out of every impulse
- Practice introspection. And check your assumptions against reality
- Talk to someone about your obsessive love. Sometimes speaking helps soften the intensity of obsessive love a little
- Write about your obsessive love. Writing also helps to alleviate the emotionality
- If obsessive love becomes a real problem for you or others, seek professional help from a psychotherapist or psychiatrist
If someone has obsessive love for you and you do not feel love for him / her and you are suffering from the other person's obsessive love, here are a few tips:
- Make it clear to the other person that you have no love for him / her
- Avoid spending time with the other. In particular, don't let misunderstood compassion mislead you into being alone with the other person, giving him / her a smile, etc. Ignoring is a better strategy
- Don't explain yourself over and over again
- You may ask others to spend time with the person concerned, to give them other thoughts, to do something with them
- If the other goes as far as stalking, explain to the other that you do not want that and threaten the police. Call in the police if necessary
- If the other person's obsessive love is bothering you, seek professional help from a psychotherapist or psychiatrist
- Spend time in a yoga ashram - this will give you different thoughts. Find the spatial separation from the other
- Practice yoga and meditation. This will help you maintain your inner balance and get the strength to do what is necessary
If someone is inflamed with obsessive love for you, here are a few tips:
- Consider yourself lucky that someone loves you so much
- Tell the other person that you love him / her too
- Tell the other person that you love them more often
- Tell the other what your needs are - the other will happily respond to them, their obsession will get an object to pounce on
- Refrain from doing anything that might give the other legitimate cause for jealousy
- If you are spatially separated, contact me more often, by phone, SMS, email, Skype, etc.
- Accept that the price of intense love from such a partner is that they control you more often and overwhelm you with great emotional fluctuations. Intense expressions of love will alternate with reproaches and great doubts about your love
- Help the other to pursue their own other interests or to find them again in the first place
- You may be looking for help in a partner counseling, marriage counseling
Obsessive love for God
You can also feel an immense love for God. An obsessive love for God can be a characteristic of a mystic, a bhakta, a worshiper of God. If you love God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all of your being, it acts like an obsessive love to others. This type of love for God can actually take on many characteristics of obsessive partner love:
- God is at the center of life
- The longing to experience God is more important than anything else
- Experiencing the presence of God leads to immense happiness
- The loss of experience of God's presence can lead to despair and abandonment
- To serve God, to feel God, to experience God, becomes the center of life
Obsessive love for God can be pathological to outsiders. Of course, obsessive love for God can also be an escape. However, most people who have attained God-realization have been accused of obsessively loving God from others. Presumably, the obsessive love itself is less the reason for the psychosis into which some people slide who have an obsessive love of God. Rather, the lack of support and lack of understanding from fellow human beings is the reason for this.
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